It's week 8 of the sem. If life had a remote control, i'd hit Replay/Reset so i could relive this sem in a different way. Much has been going on, but nothing has been happening. It's week 8 now and assignments and midterms are catching up to me.
I was pretty lifeless for 2 months. I know people noticed. And I know it affected some pretty badly. But I didn't care. I waited and waited for someone to come along and just say:"Buck up Jian." But no one did. Everyone was just concerned if CG was going well or not, whether the CGLs had been 'talked to' already or not.. Whether I had planned everything out for backup or not.. As if all they needed/wanted from me was for me to deliver. Rather than investing in me as a person, as a friend, as a senior. Just cause I'd been through more than you doesn't mean I've all the answers. Or rather, just because I've the answers I can't be expected to believe in what I say 24/7. I'm human, I've my doubts my moments of weaknesses.
But I don't blame you... Hardly anyone knows the real me here anyway. Hence my expectations might've been too far fetched. Closing off doors expecting people to break through them probably isn't the way to go HAHAHHAAHAH... Sound like girl nie XD... Was glad Alvin came down for most of the week. Didn't confess my issue to him; but I actually went to classes.. I actually went out..
But regardless; it's time to hit ignition again. Gotta help myself. Hence I'm letting it out here. God won't you take control again.
...but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar
on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk
and not be faint.
A verse which kept ringing in my mind all this while... time to soar.
P.S. If I may seem blunt, these feelings have been pent up for 2 months.. So I apologize. Hold it against me if u must, but do forgive me my transgressions. =)