A random story... just because i felt like it.. XD

. . . as the bus rumbled by, I glanced at my watch, wondering when Bus No. 5 will come by. It's been a gloomy afternoon, as the clouds ran by over my head, as if racing to see who'd get to the end of the rainbow first. Rain seemed imminent since morning; yet not a droplet of it was in sight. A cruel joke on housewives having clothes to dry isn't it?

Today is my son's birthday... He's 5 this year, and I'm very excited to see his reaction when he sees the gift I'd bought him. It was a full set of a Lego Pirate Ship. I really hope he'll like it. It took me a whole afternoon of walking around the Toys R' Us in the local mall looking for the right set. It's been awhile since I saw my son. You see he stays a little away from me. That's why I have to take a bus to get to his house.

As I was mulling over my own thoughts the bus pulled up.

"Ticket to Pearl Street please," I said to the conductor.

"2 dollars," came a brisk, no nonsense reply. I paid my fare, and sat down on a seat at the third row. As the driver drove off, my thoughts began to wonder again..

About 20 minutes passed, and the bus dropped me at Pearl Street. My son should be staying at the end of the street... It was already 6pm, close to dinner... 'Maybe we can have take out tonight?' Again my thoughts wandered as I admired the neighbourhood while walking up to my son's house. Some kids were cycling around, while a dog chased a cat around not too far away. I took a deep breath, and walked up the lawn, and rang the doorbell to my son's home.

As the door opened, I shouted: "Happy 5th Birthday Michael! Look what daddy got ya?"

"Dad, I'm 35 already.. Did you sneak out of the old folk's home again?" Michael replied. I beamed and just nodded.

"Aw dad you do this every year; but I know you'll never forget my birthday. I love you dad," Michael said as he hugged me right across the back. A tear rolled down my cheek as I hear a young boy's voice at the back of the house: "Daddy daddy is Grandpa here to celebrate your birthday again?!"

-The End-

It's been awhile...

As the title says, yea... haven't been blogging for awhile. Mostly cuz my main inspiration is kinda gone nowadays.. heh.. Things are going so slow its glacial... or maybe i've grown so apathetic that I don't seem to care anymore... but i want to.. at least i think i want to. Just wondering when will i snap out of this.

Midterm on Thurs. Hope my CG can jadi lah... To be honest i really dunno what else i can do.. just so few people every week. We shall see when everyone comes back =)

Been binging on World of Tanks for d past few days... keeps my mind off things.. although i kinda feel bad for hogging Scott's com.. Can't wait for a pc i can call my own. XD

Well that's about it for now. Shall continue my I.T. Crowd. XD


PS. It was good to see her again. 

Blerghhhh

Rethinking my life again... Just how many times must I go through this phase man.. so tedious... XD

Rain...

It's been 2 weeks since I'm back.. more than a month since i last saw her.. come to think of it.. I really do miss her. Heh..

My thoughts hitherto are even more scrambled than Einstein's messy hair. I'd given up sorting them out. Numbs the pain at least. Just take everything step by step as they come. For now I need to focus on CF tmr, combination CGs this week, and serving on Sat..

I wish not to divulge my thoughts to anyone... there was a time I wished someone'd care enough to want to know me. There were, but I guess I'm not a very pleasant book to read. Somewhere halfway you'd find a torn off page.. misleading bookmarks everywhere.. heck the cover just looks nice while the plot is borderline non-existent. But I won't stop penning them down here i suppose.. It helps to know where my mind's been.. so that I can pull myself back, should I wander too far off course..

I've been irritable, withdrawn and just plain annoyed everytime I speak to some people... But lets hope that comes to past. For now i just wanna rest. So tired... even so, tomorrow is a new day to fight.

And now for a lil SS moment... XD

SS Moment: my design for the Easter Flyers

I wanna explode hahaha..

My heart is constantly in pieces, in a tug of war. When did it become like this, I wonder..?
When will i stop lying to myself? When will i set this heart free?
I wonder...

=)

Many things happened today.. class.. lunch.. tea.. the ride.. CF.. supper..

Somehow I feel I can finally take that step forward again.

Jehovah Rapha...

It means the LORD my Healer... indeed I wonder how long will these emotional wounds I've suffered/caused will take to heal... IF they would ever heal... But I trust in You Lord... Heal us Lord... Heal us all...


Peace be with you.. =)

Idiot

I'm such a big one. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot... Just what is wrong with me???
Lord, I hand this to you... I don't want to whine, nor wallow in guilt. Cleanse me of my sin. I REALLY want to be rid of it forever. Help me to listen to the inward man. the spirit man. the real man in me. I beg of you flesh. stop this destruction already...

A slightly different post..

I've not posted something like this before. Gonna go all geek on this one. so bear with me XD

Been frustrated lately... at my phone!! Which isn't really normal for me hahaha... but you gotta get fed up one point or another... when it takes 5 seconds to even start Whatsapp/Facebook or even the Bible on your phone... dah lah tu *i really gotta find the English equivalent to that phrase*... it restarts whenever the screen turns off while WiFi is switched on, effectively annoying the hair out of me on more than countless occasions. Yes I'm abusing the hyperbole. I don't care.. XD

Been looking at other phones... Google+LG's Nexus 4 just came out. and its selling on Digi's site for ONLY RM 499!!! With internet plan and everything. So. Friggin. Tempting. The specs are really good. It's had nothing but good reviews. Gah. But since I'm the 'yim chim' (perfectionist/OCD) type when it comes to my own gadgets... I looked around more... Galaxy S2 seems so mainstream nowadays.. everyone's using it, while not even knowing what it's capable of... The S3 lagi jia lat... the phone's smarter than 60% of the people using it. =.=...

Ah, but I digress. Hitherto I've my sights set on a new phone. But it's not out yet. And it's bound to be EXPENSIVE. But I really do want it. IF ever the opportunity presents itself... else I'll probably need to wait til I grad to afford it on my own. But here's a comparison between that phone and the one I currently own.

Le X8... *What I'm currently using*

Weight
- 104 grams
 

Dimensions
- 99 x 54 x 15 mm

Battery 
- Talk time: Up to 11 hours

Display
- 3.0 inches TFT
- 16 million colors, 320 x 480 pixels
 

OS & Processor 
- Google Android 3.6.6.7 (Custom Gingerbread: GingerDX build 21)
- 600 MHz ARM 11

Camera
- 3.15 MP, 2048x1536 pixels, no flash, no focus
- no secondary camera

Durability 
- literally made of plastic



meanwhile...


Presenting: The Xperia Z

 Yes, it IS waterproof.






 

 
Weight
- 146 grams

Dimensions
- 139 x 71 x 7.9 mm

Battery 

- Talk time: Up to 11 hours

Display

- 5.0 inches TFT
- 16 million colours, 1920 x 1080 pixels

OS & Processor 

- Google Android 4.1 (Jelly Bean)
- 1.5 GHz Qualcomm APQ8064+MDM9215M Quad Core

Camera

- 13 megapixel Exmor RS camera with Auto focus and flash
- 2 MP, Exmor R, front facing camera (1080p)

Durability 

- IPX5/7 (Water-resistant) & IP5X (Dust-proof) 


I don't think you'll understand just by reading the specs... but numbers don't lie.. If you've used the X8 before you'll know my frustrations. And that's with a modded phone... can daii... the screen is only 3.0 inches. I have to squint to look at facebook and whatsapp messages... But with this, hoho.. I can take HD videos, play them at 1080p.. even my LAPTOP can't support that kind of video.. it LAGS at 730p videos. Crazy. Basically to sum it up, this phone pawns even my laptop. and it's water proof. It can roundhouse kick my laptop 3 times around the earth and still have enough juice to play my favourite PS games.

Long post..*if i recall everything i wanna type*

this post has been delayed since Jan 29th. why that date? it was a special day for us... at least for me. or maybe you could call it extra special. It's been a year since then... I'd planned a month ahead, brainstorming places to go, food to eat, to hang out.. I google mapped how to get to Ferringghi just so that we don't get lost and waste time (we got lost anyway). I even timed myself so i could tell her what time i'll be reaching, and have the time to get roses for her that morning itself. There was no occasion, no motivation, nothing else was on my mind but making her the happiest woman on earth...

Stopped at her house. "Here, these are for you." She blushed so red the apple can go letak jawatan...
I lagi lah kekok. Nak act cool but my words after that came out all stuck and stuttered.

But off we went to Penang Island... it was a day of joy... we giler camwhore.. tak tahan. but it was fun.. I miss giving her face massage.. hahahahaha.. i'll not forget.. at least not for a long time.. about this relationship. Someone'll have to get me concussed, cut out a piece of my brain, and laser it.. maybe then i'd forget.. hahahaha.. tis a beautiful memory. One full of love.

Been so long since we talked. I'd sincerely forgot to reply her message to me during baptism. I was happy though. really happy. I long for us to return to a friendship equilibrium. On hindsight.. i abused our friendship and relationship with one another. I did not take care of her as a sister like i should. And i regret that. But should we ever cross paths again.. I'll treasure that new relationship.. one of company and friendship. to protect her as a sister.. to be a proper friend. But maybe not yet. maybe one day.. when we've all graduated.. with our own partners in life.. definitely.. =)


Been awhile since I'd blogged.
Well, it's exam week hahaha.. I've 4 papers. 1 ad kena bar... 2 already went by. I thank God for His grace. I could study and prepare, and not walk blindly into the exam hall. I promised myself not to do that ever again... and i won't. I hate that feeling. that pathetic feeling of helplessness. I HATE IT. that feeling of being a failure. I HATE IT. that feeling of being WEAK. I HATE IT. 

On a happier note, due to losing focus towards the last few weeks of sem (we all know why)... my coursework really jia lat. my understanding of the subject matter lagi jia lat. 13 chapters and i only understood 4... but striving not to fail... i remembered something i used to have. the drive to win. the power to understand everything. that i could do anything. I remembered how it felt when everything came to me like it was natural. because i wanted it. I'd grown complacent. Must fight. must win.

If i can maintain this mode throughout my remaining sems.. I'll be able to finish my race here well...

Learning how to starve my eyes. The fight is going well. Now the prob is my mind. Still need to direct all that nonsense somewhere else. Sports. Studies. CG. Family. Friends. Future wife. God. Gotta win this war.

Am beginning to appreciate the beauty of friendship with the opposite gender. Sure you'll kena tembak forever... but I find joy in their company.. when u have a proper mix of guys n girls. and you know how to go about it healthily *i.e. conversational topics and the way you act* its really awesome. The only way i know how to describe it is: Just like high school times. Really glad I got out of the gobsmackedsmittenicanttalklikeasanehumanbeingwhenevershesaround phase... =D

Tired of hearing talks about peoples behaviours... Sure the way they behave irks me at certain point of times. Grumble and shrug it off lah.. Must talk about them every time meh. Sometimes we focus on the dirt so much we forget someone's beauty. we forget we ourselves were made of dust (dirt). Well except women lah but that's besides the point. XD... basically that's all there is to it. Just love one another k? =)

Hannah said I forced myself to be interested in football so i can fit in. I admit it... I had no love for football.. in fact i hated it.. but in hindsight... I'm glad i did.. a whole new circle of friends opened up for me. I learned to get physical. I'm not afraid to charge ahead. It's like Aang learning Earth Bending. It was against his nature. But he had to learn it because he was the Avatar... I did it to get friends i guess.. or you could say to gain confidence. I used to be so cowardly. so scrawny. bump nie fly. but now i'm FAT! hahaha.. I still fly though. It did cost me tho.. Badminton only RM5... Futsal RM 10 leh!!

"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." Jim Elliot

Taking a little literary freedom here. This quote meant giving up our lives for God's Kingdom rather than money for friends... but you get the gist. On a side note, read up Jim Elliot's story.. He was a missionary that reached out to the people in the jungles of Ecuador, among many other places. He was killed eventually, but his legacy lived on. Google it if you wanna find out =D


But yeah... I don't regret it lah.. Someone once said... Friendship is very intentional. I even prayed before initiating some friendships. LOL... weird kan? But i believe it's needed.. especially when you can sense great walls of china around certain people. I believe friendship comes from God.. Your friends are not accidents. Speaking of which, I met Ben: a fellow BM-ian. He's a musician (i.e. he plays gigs for a living).. and Indian, super hyper.. He was like.. "Go BM!" and fist bumping me... Guess it's kinda the reaction you get when you're in somewhere new and far and you find a fellow hometown friend. He felt called by God to melaka... indeed I wonder what God has prepared for him.. We exchanged numbers and he's all like, eh if u wanna jam call me k? hahaha.. We shall see man... we shall see.

Well, i suppose that's it for now... back to studying... CP2 I shall conquer you!!!
Ps. James is coming back. The Gang shall reunite! Woots!!!